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November 3, 2008

Family First

There are times when problems come and test our faith. In most cases, we often fail. The actions - or reactions - to these problems define who we are and either create more problems for us or open up new opportunities to venture. But regardless of the actions we take, it cannot be denied that the feeling of being weary, heavily burdened, stressed out and sometimes even burnt out, is always predominant. More often than not, we tend to questions, "Why me?" Yesterday, my wife and I felt almost the same thing and asked pretty much the same question, "Why us?" With the problem besetting us both individually and as a family, we were almost feeling a little depressed. There are so much things to sacrifice, so much needs unmet. We were so powerless that all we could do was just huddle together and cry. With little money and with me so far from home most of the time because of work, life has been difficult for my family. And when our household helper decided to quit because her family wanted her to work for the meantime with her ailing uncle, it was the last straw for my family, especially for my wife. It was such a short notice, we could not find any replacement. Today is the start of my son's class for the second semester, and with another 1 year old at home, my wife found it very much difficult to move around. As soon as the helper left, we both broke down and cried. The past few days have been highly emotional.

Our son saw us both talking inside the bedroom and he must have been quite confused and concerned. I decided not to go to work this week, take my leave and for the meantime serve my family in this transition. So last night, I was sending emails to my public health manager files that she may need to present to the municipal council during the budget hearing. I was also contacting my staff informing them of my leave.

At around 7 in the evening, the lights went out. Later, we were informed that the entire city went black out.

While being bathed by his mother, my eldest asked my wife why she was always crying. My wife matter-of-factly answered him because she was sad. Then he answered that she need not worry because when he would grow up he would give her money so she wouldn't cry anymore. He also said if she was having trouble fetching him from school everyday his uncle (my wife's brother) could pick him up from school. My son, at a very young age, must have some understanding to what was already happening.

During dinner I told them all that everything's going to be fine. And that daddy is here to take care of them. The urgent desire to relocate elsewhere and start a new life has started to press even harder on both me and my wife.

While talking after dinner, we were both telling each other that maybe this was God's way of showing us how we were too attached on our mundance concerns and too detached from His providence. The Source of everything decided to pull out His gifts so we could draw ourselves back to Him. After all, the Giver is more important than the gifts. As a resolution, we decided to instill a regular habit of praying together as a family. We decided that every 6 pm will be our Family prayer time. We would read our bible infront of our family altar, say a prayer and our petitions for the day. Besides, it was high time for our eldest son to start practicing reading from the Bible.

Just before I slept, I began to realize that no matter how hard or how often we will pray, problems will still come. Therefore, if there is something we should be praying for, it is a change in attitude towards this problems in life. So, maybe next time, instead of asking, "Why me?" I might probably say, "Why not?"

1 violent reactions. React Here.:

Eva Caroline said...

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