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February 6, 2010

So Little Time, So Much Things To Do

I can only ask from God enough time to do so many tasks. I need a break. I can see the danger signs already, telling me to slow down and take a moment to breathe. I do want to take a break. My body is as strong as my health would permit it. The past few days I have been down with the flu. I had to go home and take a well needed rest. The 24 hours a day 5 days a week mode of work is taking its toll. Yes, I am on duty 24 hours a day. My Rural Health Unit is open 24 hours a day. So even after office hours, I would still see patients who would come to visit the RHU either for late-night consultations (which I am trying to discourage already) or emergency cases. I am accompanied by my night-shift staff. There are times that there are no patients. There are times too that there are many emergency cases in just one night. Since I would sleep in the RHU (I do not have a private residence of my own), the night staff would usually wake me up to refer patients. When it comes to deliveries, my midwives are the ones handling them. They would only wake me up if the baby is already out or if there are lacerations or if there are complications such as a hypertensive pregnant patient.

In the morning, regular consultation begins as early as 7 in the morning. It would proceed until lunch break although at times, a few patients would still come during lunch time to seek consultation. Of course, I am only human so I would tell them to come back in the afternoon or wait for 1 pm for the afternoon consultation. Sometimes, these regular consultations would be interrupted by meetings in the municipal hall. If it's a Wednesday, I would go to the barangays with the EPI team.

There are lucky days when I can sneak a siesta time in the afternoon, when the OPD is benign and there are no scheduled meetings. After office hours, I would still sit in front of the computer or my laptop to write letters and memos or unload my brain with ideas for the RHU.

Not that I am complaining. I thrive in this kind of work. The pay is bad and since that "fiasco" last November, I have developed some sense of mistrust with some of the municipal employees. But then again I feel that I was born for this, for this kind of work.

My only consolation is the thought of my family's support. There are those in the community who are not appreciative of the work and sacrifice that we do. I do not mind. Sometimes though I would feel so down and out and my mind would go blank. And when one's mind goes blank, the devil would start playing with your thoughts. He would fill it up with ideas of frustration, of giving up, of running away. Thank God for small saving graces that would come my way.

So while I still have the God-given time, I will be doing what I can for as long as my flesh allows me, even when the trickle of appreciation comes less and less.

May God grant me more time.

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