Losers and Winners.

I have survived my 6th Grand Rounds Presentation yesterday. The presentation was attended by the bigwigs in the field of Pediatrics, Pediatric Surgery and even from other departments like Internal Medicine and OB-GYNE. The presentation took about an hour and a half. And when I was done, I felt a heavy weight being lifted off my chest. I survived my grilling. I did not die. I survived.

The best part was when my fellow PGIs huddled around me, shook my hands and gave me taps on my shoulders saying, "well done!" Even my consultant, Dra. Amanted, our Pediatric Neurologist, approached me and shook my hand. She told me it was very good. And that alone was enough. I had to contain myself from crying. I could not believe how I pulled it through. Thank God for the strength and the inspiration. I felt Him with me throughout my entire presentation. And I did not fail myself.

But what also actually drove me to make my presentation as excellent as I could was a comment posted in my previous blog, For all the Skeptics Out There! The anonymous commentator left this comment in my blog:

"Don't be so cocky boy, you still have a l-o-n-g way to go boy! You may be wearing the white blazer as well as the title of MD on your shoulder, but you still have to pass the board exams. This is a challenge to you and your batch, you won't make it 100%. We know the caliber of your batch, most are dumb, some are idiots and a few are average. I think you belong to the average, pull yourself together boy. You may be the number 2 of your class but that is in your batch, you're nothing compared to the hundreds of medical graduates throughout the Phil."

I posted my own reply to this particular comment:

"first of all, i wasn't being cocky. Firstly, tt isn't cocky trying to prove oneself against obviously a multitude of critics and skeptics. Second of all, if what you said is true that you "know the caliber of your batch, most are dumb, some are idiots and a few are average," then you don't know our batch. That's the problem with you (whoever you are) and the rest of the skeptics out there. You seem to be really underestimating the potentials of others, especially my batch. Remember though that even the least expected to pass the medical boards DID pass the medical boards. And those who were even expected to make it DID NOT even make it. So again, you may be even eating your shitty words in the end. So if I were you, lighten up and instead of passing out negative shit and pulling other people down with your obviously discouraging non-constructive criticisms, go find a nice mother to breastfeed you and make you happy."

Later, I found out he came with another reply to my comment.

"Boy oh boy!Im not underestimating your batch, im stating facts! Those you were expecting to make it passed the boards! Your batch wont even make it 20% . Plain and simple fact. I am really looking forward to next years board exam... La Salle, Bacolod- 20%.! Ha! I think you will not even make it. You are expected to pass but you wont make it!
This will be the time that what you just said will come true! Eat your shit Dumb boy!The next time you scrub for me, ill be watching you! You may be eating your own words! Come to think of it, I might be the one stabbing you with the scalpel! You still have a long way to go! Go fuck your wife!Its free!ha!"

Ever the debater, I left my own reply:

"you said, "Those you were expecting to make it passed the boards!"

Shall I cite to you the many people I know whom I EXPECTED to pass the boards BUT DID NOT make it? Never mind. I shall not embarass them here. Besides. It doesn't mean that if they didn't make it now they won't make it next time. I know of so many doctors who took the boards more than ONCE. And they turned out FINE.

you said, "Your batch wont even make it 20% . Plain and simple fact."

Again, this is not a statement of fact but rather a statement of opinion. And opinions, though respected in a democractic society, does not necessarily account itself to be a fact.

you said, "La Salle, Bacolod- 20%.! Ha! I think you will not even make it. You are expected to pass but you wont make it!

Again, another statement of opinion which I shall take as a personal challenge. At least, I take this challenge head on and do not hide myself under an anonymous name. Only cowards do.

you said," Eat your shit Dumb boy!The next time you scrub for me, ill be watching you!"

What makes you think I'd be scrubbing for you in the future? You must be presuming that I shall take up surgery and therefore be one of your future residents (and I am just assuming you are a surgeon or an OB resident of some sort). But then again, before I come to that, I must pass the boards right? And even if I do scrub for you someday, just make sure that you will be doing a nice job on your patient. It is scary to have it leaked out how a pathetic surgeon you are. And again I am just presuming here that you are indeed one. I have scrubbed for many doctors as JIs and PGIs and while it is expected that in our level we don't know shit, it is expected that at their level they should know their shit. But I have been witness to residents and even doctors who couldn't find their shit during their OR. And I have seen the best surgeons as well. So, don't be watching me during your OR. Rather, be mindful of your job. I, on the other hand, would just be assisting you. And again I am just making presumptions here that I would in the future.

you said,"You may be eating your own words! Come to think of it, I might be the one stabbing you with the scalpel!"

I think we both shall.
And not if I do you first.

you said,"You still have a long way to go!"

Of course. Like you do perhaps. Assuming that you are a resident or even a consultant. Once a person has taken the road of doctors, it is always and will be long. Even the brightest doctors of our times do not stop from studying. And who said we will? The board is just the first step to a long and painful journey. But I am optimistic that despite the hurdle of criticisms laid before me and my batch, we shall overcome it, through and by the grace of God.

you said, "Go fuck your wife!Its free!ha!"

At first I didn't want to respond to this but this just shows how a sad and pitiful creature you must be. I do hope you had a happy childhood and all of your Ericksonian conflicts already resolved. For judging by the way you write your arguments, it seems you have some developmental delay, probably in the emotional aspect."

It is so obvious that so many people have little or no faith at all in our batch. We are always described as the dumbest batch perhaps ever to step foot in the College of Medicine of USLS. What is making it "worse" is that at large, so many describe the USLS College of Medicine as perhaps the dumbest ever medical college in the country. But then again, it is up to us to prove them wrong.

We are swimming against a huge tidal wave of skepticism and criticism from so many people, unfortunately, even those coming from the least we expected. Yet our spirits remain steadfast. None shall make us bow down to surrendering. We shall spend every energy, utilize every stroke, and shall swim our way against the rush of discouragements. We shall find ourselves drenched. We shall find ourselves broken. We shall find ourselves torn. But by the Grace of God we shall remain undefeated. Our perseverance shall fuel us to drive through these hurdles that come our way. If God would be so kind as to grant us His humility, allow us all to be immersed in His own suffering, when during His last days He too was told He won't make it. Then all of these skeptics shall forever be silenced.

Perhaps it is criticisms like these that awaken sleeping giants. Take heed, skeptics, those coward critics who hide in anonymous names, and who can't even make out the difference between an opinion and a fact, beware the monster you create out of your harmful criticisms. A friend of mine in DeviantArt posted this comment regarding the comment from the anonymous person that he has read in my blogspot:

"Wow, some people really give the human race a bad name, don't they.

You've done all the work to get where you are, and none of it has been easy. You know you have the dedication and commitment to succeed in your endeavours, and every reasonable person you meet will also see that.

As for the unreasonable? As you said, f*** 'em." - regards, James.

"For the believer, no proof is necessary. For the skeptic, no proof is enough."